Assalamualaikum Sahabati.
Today I feel like writting, walau only few sahabat yang akan membacanya but syukur dapat berbagi kebahagiaan. If mom know she maybe mad at me now for sharing life stories here. Anyway, I just wana share few moments happening around last september tho.
And how to start? hmm.. it was started off when I heard a sad news from my family in Jakarta, when my Auntie texted me and mom that my Grandfather was ill on sunday morning. And mom feels like going back home the soonest possible! So I decided to deposit a cash to my cash card, where unfortunately after I deposit some cash I thought I can use the card directly to book a ticket online but I was false. As I called Call centre, they explained that it takes 2 days to be able to use the cash that I deposited. Where I went home with disappointment. If only I could call them earlier, my mom probably be back in Jakarta on the same day or early monday morning.
So as time goes by, we decided to book the ticket by monday morning, it was one fine morning, I went to work as usual, and mom went to the bank to withraw some money and went to airasia to book the ticket. I decided to join after my work is done. Unfortunately, on the same morning I received another text by my aunt saying that "Mbah Meninggal" where my heart pound so quick and I was so nervous where tears started to fall. Then mom called asking things about the ticket pricing. And I told her on the spot that her father just passed away and she was shocked and suddenly the environment was quite for a moment. I was so nervous that I should have informed her face to face rather than on the phone. Then I decided to take one day emergency leave to settle things up and send mom to the airport for an afternoon flight, 10th Sept 2012...
To cut it short, it was 4 days till my birthday. Since early of the year, I got good news and come a time just exactly before my 24th birthday my grandfather passed away. I was so sad to be left alone with my brother at these time, but Allah have another plan. I accept it with open heart. And just be positive..
As days goes by, towards the end of September. On the 25th, at dawn, My cat died. Indescribable feeling at that time. Was wondering and keep on thinking it was a gloomy september, indeed! I dont feel it was my year... May beloved cat Mimit, the night before she died.. I was cleaning up the kitchen and she went out and I thought it would be ok to leave her outside cos usually nothing happen. So I was so stupid that I don't even care.. I never expect that this would happened. So during the dawn, I heard dogs barking around the house, at first I don't really care cos I was so sleepy that suddenly I woke up as I remember Mimit was outside without thinking further, I shoo the dogs away and I went out of the house taking with me my Car key to switch on the highlight, the weather I remember was raining cats and dogs. So I dare myself to go out and checked cos I was so worried when I called up Mimit's name but no respond I suddenly saw a small body lying just infront of the coconut tree, as I go near...Im speechless the body was motionless and I thought it was other cat, BUT No, it was Mimit! :'( I really feel sory for her... if not because of me letting her out that night, things will not happened! :'(
Well anyway, taking it positively again... I believed that Allah loves her more. Was so sad... but no one to turn to, only my brother understand me how I felt.. he said..." it was a very sady month for me..." I said yes, indeed...but it's okay".
But I was so happy that on the same day, 25th September 2012 was my luckiest day too where I received a call from jpke informing me to dropby to their office to take a letter. I was curious, but was stupid that I dont even ask! Haiyaa!! All I can think, was I getting an offer for a scholarship? was I?? Was I?? was so anxious! So the next day straight from home I went to jpke to take the letter. Alhamdulillah, I was so thankful that they said I was given a scholarship to further my studies to degree... Alhamdulillahirabbilalamin......... Subhanallah, I was terribly indescribably happy with joy and butterflies in my stomach! Feels like wanted to screem! Once again, the officer in charge congratulate me! and I was really-really happy! Alhamdulillah..... :))))) The morning I received the letter, I texted mom that I got the scholarship! Subhanallah... Mom this is for you. And She's really happy... :)
Remebering my conversation with her just before she departed to Jakarta, I have a small fight with her and I was ssssoooooo sad, when I cried like a kid wanted a toys! Tersedu sedan.. (Overly sad) why??
Because of financial issues my mom suddenly said,
"Nadiah, No need to further your studies cos we need money at the moment. Your studies is too expensive! It's better for you to work and save money first" ........and the conversation goes on... I cried terribly infront of her, but I don't speak a thing, except to keep on crying. I really wanted to further my studies.. I really amm..........!!! I know I'm angry and my mouth seperti bisu kelu. Whenever I remember this conversation and realising that I got this scholarship my tears wil definitely fall! :'( :'( :'(
Dear friends, who would expect, initially she keep motivating me to further my study when suddenly she change her mind! (due to financial problem). Despite the rain, a rainbow came. Despite the sorrow & hardship, success just around the corner. Who would expect that right? I really am feel grateful & thankful now. Alhamdulillah.....
Allah is great! Allah is the best planner... It's just us either to give up or to move on...
Till then, Je'taime beaucoup! Mwah! ;)
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